Review of Lucky Bastard. This is a creepy ass movie.

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Warning: Spoilers

Lucky Bastard is a movie about a guy named Ernest who wins a contest to have sex on camera with a porn star.

It starts with a vicious rape, which turns out to just be a scene for a porn. Then we learn about the Lucky Bastard contest. The porn star, Ashley, is reluctant to do the contest, but the director, Mike, talks her into it. Mike, also has a girlfriend, Kasey who is an aspiring porn star.

From jump Ernest is disturbing. He’s really pale with blond hair, blue eyes, really Aryan looking. He starts off like a nervous, really awkward guy, with an under layer of perversion. He gives a fake name, calls Ashley by her real name, mentions her kids to her and asks her on a date. She’s completely turned off and refuses to work with him. But apologizes and she agrees to proceed.

A few moments into their love scene, Ernest orgasms, just from Ashley touching him. He shoves her to the floor. He’s extremely humiliated and very upset.

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Ashley is also very upset about being violently pushed and again refuses to do the scene. This time she can’t be cajoled. So, the director asks Kasey to do it. She flips! She doesn’t appreciate that her boyfriend would ask her to do this particular scene. She storms off and calls a friend for a ride.

Meanwhile two of the camera men are laughing hard at Ernest, in his face, about his performance, which further infuriates him.

Mike decides to complete the scene with Ashley and a professional instead of Ernest. She agrees. Ernest however is livid that he can’t have another chance with her. He demands the tapes, but Mike refuses. One of the cameramen feels bad for Ernest and gives him a ride to either a bus or train station.

The other cameraman has a friendly argument with the director about the horrible way he treats people.

Ernest kills the cameraman that gave him a ride, in the car, by bashing his head in with a brick.

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Back at the house, which has video cameras throughout because it was once used for a reality show, the professional, Josh (whose body is ridiculously gorgeous) comes to finish the scene. The realtor who leant them the house comes as well.

Ernest has sneaked back into the house. He smashes the realtor in the head with a bat, killing her. He’s about to smash Mike in the head, but he sees Ernest on screen and turns around in time to stop him. Ernest demands the tape of him prematurely ejaculating. Mike tries to pull a gun on Ernest. Instead Ernest knocks the gun out of his hand, bounds him, then takes the gun and holds it against Ashley, Josh, and the remaining cameraman. He demands the tapes and says he doesn’t want to hurt anyone.

He makes the cameraman tie Ashley up. Josh is tied up too. Then Ernest takes the cameraman to get the video tapes. Instead Ernest shoots him in the back.

Ernest then rapes Mike with a very large dildo, then shoots him in the back.

He goes back to Ashley and Josh. He has a conversation with Josh about how a straight guy can have sex with a man for pay. Making sure to say this information was not from his own experience, he goes on to explain. So, Ernest says he’ll let Josh go if Josh can masturbate. At gun point, Josh jerks off. As he’s doing it, Ernest beats him with the gun and kills him.

Kasey comes back to the house while Ernest is verbally torturing Ashley. Ernest confronts her and shoots her in the back.

Ashley is still tied up on the bed when he comes back. Her weapon is seduction. She talks him into untying her so they can have sex. He does and they do. Then she grabs his dick, hurts him bad enough to make him collapse, grabs the gun and shoots him, killing him. Face to face. Not in the back like he done the people he’d shot.

Ashley half smiles into the camera, then turns it off.

I needed to post this as a reminder that it's just a movie.
I needed to post this as a reminder that it’s just a movie.

What I liked:

There’s a line that the Mike says “…this industry happens because the girls. Do you get that? If one day all the girls walked up and said, ‘no more porn,’ you know what? There’d be no more porn.” I’m not anti or pro porn. I think it’s a weird that prostitution is illegal, but sex for money is ok as long as it’s on film. But it would be amazing if women did that. But they have bills just like everyone else. How many of us are out here doing things we hate for money? How many people have heart attacks from the stress of their jobs?

I also like when Ashley says, “You know what? I had a marriage like this. Abuse, apology, abuse, apology. No fucking way. No fucking man is ever gonna abuse me again!” I liked it because Ernest crosses the line twice, and apologizes. I like that it only takes twice for her to recognize him as an abuser. Abusers start slowly, and escalate as they see they can. She called it, and I liked that the movie showed it in that way. Sure she’s involved in porn, but she’s a human first and even she has her limits.

I’m not sure exactly what I’m supposed to get out of this movie, other than the two points that I mentioned above. Which are that women are ultimately in control of the porn industry, and abusers give you signs. I guess, don’t underestimate humiliation. Don’t underestimate weak looking people, because today may be the last day that they are taking any shit. And don’t piss off wiry Aryan men.

I don’t want to rate this movie because it is someone’s creation and they put their money and time into bringing it forth. I liked the actors who played Ashley, the first cameraman that was killed and Josh. It’s completely not my cup of tea. Had I known about all of the death in the movie, I would not have watched it. I didn’t like that at all. I hate seeing serial killer, or random killing type movies. Though, this might rank as a revenge film, the reason for the revenge sucks to me. He’s no victim.

I know one thing… I won’t be watching any porn tonight.

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